Scene I

Punch and Judy


Here is funny Mr. Punch,

So fond of giving blows.

We may know him by his hunch,

And by his large red nose.


Punch mind what you're about,

You will make the baby cry;

Your stick is very stout,

And may black poor Judy's eye.


Oh! yes, we hear you sing

Ri-too-ey, too-ey too,

Pray, Punch, is that the only thing

That you were taught to do.





Scene II

Punch, Judy and Baby


Ri too-ey, Judy! pretty pretty pretty dear!

I am so glad to see you here!

Oh what a pretty baby - rather!

The very image of his father!


What! Judy, do you mean to cry?

Why, yes, - you hit me in the eye.
I'll just lie down, and kick, and die!

I'll tell the Beadle, - I am dead.


Ri too-ey, too-ey, too-ey, ti,

Judy's happy - so am I.





Scene III

Punch and Beadle


But here is the BEADLE,

As sharp as a needle.

You bad man, Punch, said he,

You bad man, Punch, said he,

You must now go with me.


Go with you! - go where?


Why, to prison, down there,

For beating your wife,

And taking her life.


Is that all, you old Clown?

I'll soon knock you down.


I'll soon settle you, with too-ey, too-ey, too.






Scene IV

Punch and Clown


Who talk'd about the CLOWN?

And knocked the Beadle down?


Ri too-ey, too-ey, too!

And who on earth are you? -

Ri too-ey, too-ey, tee.


Turn round, and you shall see.


That's just what I should like;

For if I see, I strike.


I'll lead you such a dance,

Before you have the chance.


O dear, O dear!

I'll killed outright! {can fight.

I'll send the Black Man, - be






Scene V

Punch and Shallabala


Shallabala! Shallabala! Shallabala!

Massa Punchee, how you are?

Shallabala! Shallabala! Shallabala!

Massa Tea-Pot, come and see.


Why for you call me Tea-Pot, sar?

Dat tick of yours, him iron bar. -


Which you shall feel,

'Twill do you good -

I'll let you know

The taste of wood.


(Knocks him down,)


Oh wolla! - wolla! - wolla. wow!

Me dead an' buried, done for now!





Scene VI

Punch and Ghost of Judy


Ri too-ey, too-ey, - Oh! what's that?

Why, He's a She without a hat.



So come with me.


No! - I'll stay here, -

We can't agree.


You must come now,

So just be quick.


If you don't go,

I'll use my stick.


Now Judy's gone, I'll go to sleep,

And Toby a look-out will keep.




Scene VII

Punch and Dog Toby


Bow-wow! wow!! wow-wow!!!

What is TOBY at now?

Oh! dear, - I suppose,

It was he who bit my nose.


Bow-wow! wow! bow-wow!!

Now don't make that row.

Bow-wow! wow-wow!

Toby! Toby! Toby!


Bow - wow - wow - wow!

Why, poo-er To-by,

Bow - wow - wow - !!


To-by! - To - Oh my nose!

Oh, oh! Rou-ey, too-ey, too-ey.





Scene VIII

Punch returns Thanks


Ri-too-ey, - too-ey-tum

Roo-ey too-ey, toe!

Toby - my dog Toby, come,

It is time to go.


Now Toby, mind you do not bite,

And you must learn to be polite.


There's a good dog - come here and try

To make a bow, and say Good-by.


Bow wow wow. Bow wow.


Well, you go, I think for now,

Ri too-ey, too-ey tie,

Ladies and Gentlemen,



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